7 Things You Absolutely Need To Know About Pushing During Labor

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Pushing during labor.

Over 30k moms have shared my post on how to push during labor, so it is clear that this is one of the things that many many moms think about in the weeks leading up to the big day.

If you’re reading this, you probably want to know how to do it, how it feels, how long it will last, will you poop, etc etc…

As a mom I totally get wanting to know all the ins and the outs of pushing during labor because I’ve been there!

But as an experienced doula, I can definitely tell you that it’s something you’ll have to experience on your own.

I do have to add though that it is much easier than it seems— just needed to get that out of the way!

Though all of our experiences will be unique, and we all won’t really know what it’s like until were actually in the trenches, there are some things that we should all know beforehand, about pushing during labor.

**This post may contain affiliate links. I am NOT a licensed medical professional. Everything you read here is for informational purposes only. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional and do your own research before you do anything. For my full disclosure policy click here.

1) You Will Probably Poop During Labor

Yes it’s true. 

But the good part about this is no one cares.

Your nurse, your midwife, and anybody else that is part of your birth team have already witnessed this hundreds of times.

Pooping during labor is a good indicator that you are pushing the right way, because giving birth is quite honestly very similar to taking the biggest poop of your life (sounds gross but it’s true).

If When you do poop, they will clean you up so fast, you won’t even have time to be embarrassed!

In fact, the clean up is so fast that some moms don’t even notice!

No one is going to make a big deal about it, so don’t let this distract you and and make you push incorrectly like I did with my first baby.

I pushed long and hard because I was terrified of pooping and I hurt my pelvic floor! 

The second time around, I totally didn’t care about this and had a super smooth labor. No strains, no injuries.

2) It Should Not Be Done On Your Back

When you think of a woman giving birth, you’re probably picturing her in a reclined position, flat on her back with her knees pulled all the way back. 


Well, I don’t blame you because this is still by far the most commonly assumed position during the 2nd stage of labor. 

Over 65% of women give birth on their backs!

Although the dorsal lithotomy position is the most common pushing position, it is one of the worst positions for labor.

Studies have shown that this position is responsible for many complications and injuries obtained during labor such as:

  • Anal incontinence
  • Sexual Dysfunctions
  • Symphysis Pubic Disorder (SPD)
  • Slow labor and weaken contractions
  • Smaller pelvis- Laying down reduces the size of your pelvic outlet by up to a whopping 30%! 
  • Causes mom to push harder increasing chances tearing during childbirth, exhaustion, and pelvic floor injuries
  • Increased pain during labor
  • Increased chance of wanting pain killers
  • Can cause low blood pressure in mom and cause baby to go into distress which can lead to a C-section
  • Places birth canal in a position that forces mom to push harder since baby is forced to travel upwards
  • Due to the complications this position can cause, it also increases the risk of medical intervention such as use of forceps and such as the administration of Pitocin (synthetic oxytocin)

So with all of that being, why are most women still birthing in this position?

Well, the truth is, most women give birth in hospital setting.

Giving birth in that position is more of a matter of convenience for your birth team than anything else. They want to have easier access in case anything happens.

But honestly, the majority of natural births are straight forward. In a true physiological birth where the woman is left to labor as she pleases, the risks of complications are low. 

Even in the event of a complication, it isn’t hard for the birth team to access what they too access. 

So there really is no need for anyone to have a full view of what’s going on down there the entire time.

One of my doula clients gave birth while half-standing and no one knew (not even me) that she was giving birth.

By the time she said she felt something was in-between her legs, we looked and lo and behold, her baby girl was right there! Her entire head was already out.

Baby girl was just chilling! No one saw anything, no one needed to see anything. It was amazing!

Try out different labor positions and see what you feel most comfortable with!

3) Things Go Faster After The First Baby

If you’ve already given birth once, your subsequent births will be faster.

On average, first labors typically last 18 hours, while second labors tend to last about 8 hours.

My labor with my fist baby lasted 4.5 hours. With my second child, it only took 2.5 Hours!

I like to think of it as the first baby paves the way for the next one.

Your hips will be wider, and your muscles and ligaments will be looser since they’ve already gone through the process of labor. Your cervix will also dilate faster.

4) Coached & Purple Pushing Are No Good!

Coached pushing is what happens when you are told when and how to push during labor, while holding your breath, once you reach 10cm dilation.

It’s one of the things you should avoid for a successful natural birth!

Maternal pushing or spontaneous pushing is when you push as you are led to push by your body’s own natural urges.

Coached pushing during labor should be avoided because it goes against your bodies natural urges, thus increasing the risk of experiencing complications and injuries during labor such as: pelvic floor, bladder, and perineum injuries.

Following your body’s natural urges is key to having a successful natural birth.

This makes perfect sense because if you really think about it, in a natural birth, only you have the ability to feel what is occurring within your body.

What sense does it make to allow outsiders to tell you what to do and when? 

If you feel like you need to push, go ahead. If you don’t, relax and let your body do what it does best!

Some moms can breathe their babies out without pushing at all, while others like myself, can’t control the powerful (and I mean powerful) urge to push.

As long as you are following your body’s lead and are not being coached, the chances of experiencing complications are really low.

The benefits of spontaneous pushing include:

All of these benefits of spontaneous pushing during labor will help you have a quicker and easier postpartum recovery

5) You May Not Even Feel Like Pushing

You may not feel like pushing once you are 10cm dilated.

And guess what?

There is nothing wrong with that. Again, your body will do what it needs to do when it needs to do it!

As long as you and baby are both doing well during labor, there is no need to rush.

If you feel like resting, rest!

Childbirth can be exhausting so you can use any “spare time” you have to really relax and just be in the moment.

There is a stage during labor called the ‘rest and be thankful’ stage. This is where you are fully dilated and your contractions really slow down or stop altogether for about an hour or so.

During this time your body and baby are both at work, opening up and rotating to further prepare for birth.

Rather than over-exerting yourself during this time rest.

Soon after this stage of rest, the urge to push will resume and your baby will make its way into the world!

6) You May Not Be Able To Control The Urge

This is a good thing because you should NOT be trying to control your contractions. These 17 moms who shared what labor contractions really feel like will all tell you that It’s an impossible task!

In an undisturbed, natural physiological birth, the urge to push can be so powerful that it is nearly impossible to hold back.

And that’s a good thing. Your body is doing what it is supposed to do to birth your baby.

For me, that urge was so strong all I could do was ease into my contractions (in other words not resists), by pushing as my body led me to push.

Holding them back would have probably made me explode. Seriously.

If you feel the urge to push, push. Initially you might feel like resisting those contractions because they can be so strong, but that would be the wrong thing to do.

To give you a better understanding, imagine falling from a distance.

Your natural response would be to brace for impact by tensing up your body.

This would be the right thing to do in that situation because you want to limit the risk of injury once you hit the ground.

But during labor, you want to completely avoid tensing your body, by giving into your contractions and not resisting them. Don’t brace, relax!

Resisting your contractions will cause unnecessary stress and tension to build up in your body and cause you to experience more pain.

**The only time where you shouldn’t pushing through your contractions, is when baby’s head starts crowning and you begin to experience a burning sensation.

At this point you will need to stop pushing and give your vaginal tissues the time they need to stretch. This will keep you from tearing.

7) You Don’t Actually Have To Push During Labor

I saved this one for last because I mean, it’s pretty neat! To think that you actually don’t have to push during labor…..

That’s amazing! And good news, it’s true!

Your body would still be able to birth your baby on its own if you were (God forbid) in a comatose state.

From your cervix ripening, effacing, and dilating, to your uterus contracting and expelling your baby and placenta, all of these physiological processes can take place without your active participation.

That’s right, you really don’t actually have to push consciously during labor!

So erase every image you have in your head of women on TV pushing till they are purple in the face. Do it now!

Because that’s just not how it has to be. 

I’m not saying you shouldn’t push during labor, I’m saying you don’t have to if you don’t feel the need to— yep, even when you reach 10cm dilation (as long as both you and baby are coping well)!

You can and should push properly during labor if you feel the need to, but if you don’t it doesn’t mean that something is wrong.

As we discussed earlier, in a natural birth, your body will communicate its needs and you will know how to respond accordingly.

Let your body do what is does best and flow through the birthing process as best as you can.

Check out these 3 amazing moms who gave birth while being in a coma:

Some like myself may actually find relief by pushing. I felt an immense amount of pressure in my bottom once I was fully dilated.

The only way I was able to relax and ease that pressure was by pushing. I wouldv’ve probably exploded had I tried to fight it.

My body felt like puhing and I did, not caring about anything anyone around me had to say.

❤ Don’t forget to pin and share this post!

Pushing During Labor 101 - 7 Facts You Must Know. Labor tips for moms. Natural birth tips. How to push during labor. How to have a natural birth in a hospital. Labor and delivery tips. #lifeofababe #pregnancy #laboranddelivery #baby #newmom #postpartum #thirdtrimester
Labor 101 - 7 Facts You Should Know About Pushing During Labor! Labor tips for moms. Natural birth tips. How to push during labor. How to have a natural birth in a hospital. Labor and delivery tips. #lifeofababe #pregnancy #laboranddelivery #baby #newmom #postpartum #thirdtrimester


  • Melissa
    April 18, 2020 at 4:41 pm

    great list of help for mamas. my two middle kids went fast and my bookends were longer. Every birth, just like every child is different!

  • Jarid
    April 18, 2020 at 4:26 pm

    Wow! There’s so much in this that I never knew! Going into labor, I was putting all my trust in my delivery team because I had no clue what to expect. Thankfully, we had a very healthy and successful experience!

  • Yana
    April 18, 2020 at 1:20 am

    This is perfect! Definitely wish I would have read this before my first. This will really help out new mamas.

  • Adriana
    April 18, 2020 at 12:13 am

    WOW. I learned so much during my first birth and now this. Saving this!

  • Amanda Krieger
    April 17, 2020 at 8:42 pm

    pushing is so interesting because it’s definitely so different from woman to woman. I’ve had 4 unmedicated labors, and the pushing part was always the fastest — i’ve never pushed for more than five minutes.
    I always like to share my story though of my first baby. I was mostly squatting/on a birth ball, but my baby’s heart rate started to plummet. It started diminishing so much that the OB pushed me onto my back and told me to push even if i wasn’t having a contraction, even if I didn’t feel the urge. He was delivered and had a triple nuchal and had to be revived. He’s totally fine! But it was definitely a different situation, and I really believe that the best labor prep is choosing a birth team that you trust.

  • Monica
    April 17, 2020 at 2:53 pm

    Things definately went faster for me too with baby number 2. I love that you include the pooping in here, so many moms are afraid to do it but heck, you’re pushing out a 6+ pound baby! There’s a lot of pressure down there! Great post, btw


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